模糊

以往在脑海里清晰的脸孔
现在已经开始变模糊
历历在目的往事
一件一件在脑海消失
是我记忆力变差吗？
只需短暂的时间就可冲淡记忆
还是痛苦逼迫我得忘了它
因为它不应该让我常回味、常挂念...

My BABIES~

My properties, My babies =)

Will take good care of the new born baby (17th June 2010).
Welcome to the family, 8447 =D

483 In Memory

Back to Serdang for few days but this time, I'm not going to stay in 483. Walked in the taman, sighted 483 from far, warmth filled my heart. The house look so familiar to me but the people and everything inside the house already different. Feeling weird cause I did not and dare not step into 483 which is once known as "my house". I miss every party that was organized in 483, I miss the time we study hard and also "play hard" in there, I miss every corner of the house which is once filled with our laughter, I miss my pets, Fan Fan and friends

and I miss my ex-housematesss!

What's Up

Like this oldie song. Choose to upload this song without its MV because the singer look ermm.. like if you view it in mid night, you will get shock. lol

Waiting...

I'm waiting waiting and waiting. Really hate this kind of feeling cause I do not have much patient. The train I'm taking for 3 years has dropped me back to the origin, back to this familiar station. I'm now eagerly hoping for the next train to come faster to fetch me to my next destination.

But seem like this train move really slow, till now, I'm still lost, I don't know which place is my destiny, I'm still waiting..Waiting for an answer from you, GOD. Waiting for you to give me direction..

Astar Gang

Finally we have our first Alor Star coursemates "gathering" in our hometown :D

My family

i love flower, i love green grass and i love grandma

Was going to Penang, my grandma's house yesterday. The place that I like most is grandma's garden. Grandma likes flowers, she likes gardening, so her garden used to have more than ten species of flowers. But now, there are only few species left due to her stamina is getting weaker.

花的三个阶段：一枝面临凋谢，一枝灿烂开放着，一枝则含苞待放

I'm worry about grandma, no one can actually take care of her, NO ONE!! Did those uncles know how is grandma's health condition now? Concerning through phone calls do not give any help, she needs you all by her side. Feel sad for grandma.

I love her and I really hope she can stay healthy always.

Hot Air Balloon in Astar

Aku anak negeri Kedah =D

It is a surprise to know that the hot air balloon festival will be held in Alor Star, and the countries that take part in this activity are almost the same as was held in Putrajaya last time. It was a big regret that I did not have the chance to get a close shot at the balloon in Putrajaya since i reach there late. So, this time I woke up very early in the morning ( it is the earliest morning i wake up in these 3weeks time i back in Alor Star). Obviously, the photo session at 7.45am was not as crowded as in Putrajaya. Only few photography fancies like me would went there so early just to capture the nice scene of the balloons were set up. It made easier for my photo shooting as there was not too many blocking.

The cutest hot air balloon

Thanks Wan Ting for crazy together with me. Was bringing my "xiao lan" along so that she can accompany WanTing while I was busying. lol

Wanting's & my shadows

The inner of the balloon

wesak day in my hometown

无聊-ing

如果失去是苦，你怕不怕付出？

如果癡迷是苦，你會不會選擇結束？
如果追求是苦，你會不會選擇執迷不悟？

再好的东西都有失去的一天。再深的记忆也有淡忘的一天。

再爱的人，也有远走的一天。再美的梦也有苏醒的一天。

摘自facebook's note

无字部落

谢谢你，让我看清我的不重要
让我明白我一直都只是在发一场美梦
让我从沉睡很久的美梦苏醒
让我不再奢望些什么
让我不再有任何期待
没有期待，就不会有失望。

这将是我最后一篇情绪化的部落。

轨迹

Listen to many old songs recently and this is the song that i like most last time. My 1st video in my blog with my favorite song. Want to share this nice song with all of you.

Close friends in these 3 years

Pets in 483

Tang tang was sick and Fan fan was looking at her helplessly
Fan fan and the new fishes. 大只+小只 When food was feed, they all will look up together.

Tang tang 是我们家的第一只宠物，也是我二十三年来第一次照顾的动物。Tang tang 的名字由来是我们从periodic table找出来的element, 它的原名是Tungsten. 它生性好动，最爱吃蚊虫，苍蝇还有蚂蚁，因为它有很宠它的主人家常养蚂蚁，抓蚊子+苍蝇喂养。后来，因为害怕tang tang 寂寞，就找来了Fan fan 陪伴Tang tang。他们两只常在客厅陪我读书、做功课。偶尔有心事时，我会对着他们倾诉，有什么愿望，我会告诉他们，希望他们听得见，也许可以帮我实现，我是笨蛋吧？可是当时真的很希望483里有人可以听得见我心里的呐喊。后来，tang tang 丢下 fan fan 一个人走了。我看见当tang tang 生病时，fan fan 其实是很忧愁的，它让我感觉其实他很想帮助生病的tang tang。

fan fan 是只很乖巧的鱼。他不懂得欺负，他也不懂得和朋友争食物。他常常只会畏缩在一旁，食物掉在他面前，他才游上水面吃一口。而且，他也从来不会贪心，饲料从来不会像其他鱼这样塞得整口满满的。tang tang 走后，我们帮他买了两只朋友。一大一小，一只比较红是小的，大只一点的比较不红，名字到我毕业离开了都还没取，只好以一大一小称呼。小的有tang tang 的遗传，很好动。每当我喂食时，只要一把手放在鱼缸上，三只鱼儿就会往上望。把饲料握在手不放，就可以训练他们跳跃。鱼儿在一起生活久了都有感情，更不用说人类。有一天，大只的病了，我们就把三只鱼儿都分开了。可能他们都互相想念和不习惯吧，小只竟然跳到大致的缸里去.而fan fan就从他的鱼缸跳到地上，好像说没了你们，我也不想活了。不过，还好病了的大只被医好了，他们又可以在一起了。

在我离开的那天和前一天，我想用饲料再去逗逗他们，可是平时看到食物很活跃的他们都静了下来，难道他们也理解我们要分开的心情？难道他们舍不得我？看见他们这样，加重了我隔天就要离别的伤感。

希望他们可以在新的+很舒服的环境里，在那个很好人+怪怪的主人的照顾下，健康成长。我会一直一直的想念他们. I miss them...

离

我一直都很舍不得离开，一分开，就再也很难相见。
我一直都很害怕离开， 一分开，我们会变得陌生。
我一直都不想要离开，一分开，你们就永远离开我身边。
可是你我会离别，这是改变不了的事实。
希望离别的那天，我会坚强一点。
要做到像徐志摩那样，

悄悄的我走了，正如我悄悄的来，
我挥一挥衣袖，不带走一片云彩。

潇洒。
可是，我似乎从来没有那么潇洒过。呵呵..

灰色...

我讨厌做梦，它让我睡得不好，但我更讨厌发白日梦，它让我活得不切实际.

昨晚的梦，画出我心中全部的不安。一觉醒来， 一股伤心的感觉就涌进心头，这都是昨晚做梦的后遗症。而为什么会有这样的梦，这全都来自于我白天的胡思乱想+担心。我是笨蛋吗？huh?明知那是无法改变的事实，偏偏就是一直在那里转牛角尖。我讨厌我自己，我讨厌我控制不到自己的感觉，我讨厌我控制不到自己的脑袋瓜不要去想！

难过

我不想变成现在这个样子，常常皱着眉头。可是，小小的事情都会让我不开心。我没生气任何人，只是知道了一些影响我情绪的事情。可以把伤心隐藏起来吗？怎样可以隐藏得天衣无缝呢？ 上天可说是对我还不错，我想要的他都给。但是愈是被他溺爱，我愈不能自拔。

下个礼拜，就要回到学校去了。期待？不懂，好像没有。害怕的感觉就有少少。好想好想换一个环境。最后一个学期了，时间过得太快。新的学期，我不想再是那个siao siao，傻傻的自己。都已经要23了，我想要认认真真的过最后一个学期。不能什么都怕，看到昆虫，绝对不要再乱叫，什么东西在自己有能力的范围，要自己做，要慢慢摸索，慢慢学习，不要太懦弱。在家我就是大姐啊，什么事情都是我在处理。所以在家以外也要一样，相信自己的能力。永远只相信自己！

朋友已经在为即将踏出社会作打算了。我呢？目标还没定，不过真的不想再走chemist这条路了。
什么样的工作适合我呢？好让我可以把上班当兴趣，不是负担.这份工作肯定不会是chemist.
什么地方适合我呢？吉隆坡？槟城？肯定不会是亚罗士打。
踏入大学之前，填写的那个选系表格很让人头痛。大人们说，这是决定我们的未来的票根，所以要想得很详细。
现在，我觉得我只会花三年的时间对我当时的选择作出努力，三年后，我好想可以挣脱。
毕业后，人生又有一个新的转则，所以当初的选择，并不会完全决定我的未来。

hope something /someone can distract my attention.

keep all your weakness, hide it. 让别人看见坚强，能自立的自己。我不需要任何依靠。伤心，难过统统收起来。告诉别人，我是快乐，没有烦恼的。

永远只能向前看，不要眷恋着过往